15) Yes, He Likes That Name...

[starjargon]

Not even their grandchild could come in the right order.

This idea has been rolling around in my head for awhile, so I decided to just run with it. I didn't want it to be completely heartbreaking, but I think by its nature there will be an element of sadness, but I did try to balance it as best I could. Also- way longer than any of the other chapters.

The short- unaired clip Doctor Who PS would be extremely helpful to understand this chapter. Anything familiar belongs to the BBC.

WARNING: This chapter does deal with a TimeTot. If you don't like that sort of thing, feel free to skip it- it won't become a constant thing in this series, and I'll include a warning beforehand for the chapters I may link to this one.

Two Shot- Part 1

Rory and Amy had just woken up and done their morning routines, and realized the Doctor wasn't back from his nightly date with their daughter. Though tempted to go outside and explore the planet they were on, they had no desire to stumble into whatever inevitable trouble the other couple had gotten themselves into. And, they had to admit, it was kind of nice having real private time to just chat and laugh and get in a word edgewise without their loquacious best friend. Rory had just been telling his wife a funny story about one of his long- term patients, when the TARDIS door burst open and two people, very preoccupied and loud, burst in.

"I swear I hate you!" shouted their daughter, very forcefully, even as she grasped her husband tightly to her. "I hate you, I hate you, I hate you!"

"No, Dear, you really don't." said a frantic Doctor, holding his wife just as tightly as he backed up into the TARDIS.

"This is all your fault!" said River, suddenly gasping.

"I really don't see how this can be all my fault! In fact, I'm pretty positive all evidence points to the contrary."

Suddenly, River let go of the tight grip she had on the Doctor's shoulders, breathing deeply as he took a small step back, hands still lightly on her waist.

"Of course it's-"

"Hey now, what're you two on about?" asked Amy, really not interested a prolonged shouting match.

The Doctor and River froze dead in their tracks, their mouths open as the turned and gaped at the Ponds. River recovered first.

"Oh, you idiot! I hate- aaaahhhh!" The Doctor lunged forward again, holding his now panting wife up and trying to run his fingers soothingly in her hair.

"We must've gotten turned around in the forest. Don't blame me! I was slightly preoccupied at the time!" argued the Doctor weakly at the glare his wife gave him.

"Don't touch me! We've got to get into the vortex now before we cause a paradox. Just let my father come and handle iiiiiit!"

At hearing his title and her groans, Rory ran forward and pulled the Doctor back away from his daughter. "River, what's wron-…g? Oh. So, not the River we were expecting?"

His daughter smiled up at him through her very concentrated panting. "More like a River who is expecting. Any time now." She said, trying to smile through her pain, clutching weakly at her very swollen stomach.

"Oh. My. Gosh." Said Amy, eyes as wide as saucers.

"RIGHT! Time Vortex- paradox." said the Doctor, tearing his eyes away from darting wildly between his Ponds who were very much not supposed to be in front of him and his wife who was very much in labor, as he ran up to the console and started sending them into the vortex.

"River, breathe!"

"Hadn't thought of that, Sweetie. You're so helpful. Daaadd!" She said, making Rory's left hand the victim of her next contraction since her husband's shirt was so far away.

"Ahh, River. I think you've forgotten you're stronger than a normal hum- you're right, hands heal." Exclaimed Rory, complaint cut off by a look on his own wife's face. "River- med bay, now." He said, bracing her as he helped her make her way down the hall.

Amy was torn between getting on River's other side and wanting answers. She settled for helping her to the med bay and hurrying back to the Doctor while Rory began setting up for delivery and hooking River up to the various monitors.

"Explain." She said simply, arms crossed as she stood next to the Doctor, who was trying to bookmark their exact date and time into the memory circuit so he could return them there later. "Why is River in labor? No- dumb question. Why didn't you ever mention she was pregnant? That's a pretty big thing to keep hidden from us, don't you think?"

The Doctor was silent a moment more, before he suddenly turned and grabbed Amy, hugging her tightly and slightly breaking down- intense emotions he was very unused to coursing through his body. Gratitude at being able to see them again made its way into the very essence of his being. But beyond that, there was also something else- fear. This wasn't a "a monster's chasing us, but I'm sure I'll think of something," fear, but rather, a different type he hadn't felt in centuries. This was a "the tiny person I helped make is about to enter the universe and I have no idea what to do about it," fear.

Amy hugged him back, sensing his anxiety and understanding it- to a degree. Then she finally pulled back and looked him in the eye. "Doctor?"

"Amelia." The Doctor cherished the name on his lips, "I'm not the Doctor who left the TARDIS last night. River and I must've gotten turned around at some point and instead of my TARDIS, barged in on one from younger me. River and I- this River and I, are much, much older than when you saw us last. But we don't exactly have enough time to go back and see where we went wrong now, do we?"

A scream brought them both running to the med bay, where River was sitting up and Rory was holding her hand.

"Do you want me to.."

"No! Rory, that'd be too weird. Just make sure he doesn't muck things up too badly!" said River, nodding toward the Doctor.

The Doctor stood facing his wife, anticipation coursing through his veins. With Amy on her left side and Rory on her right, she returned her husband's slowly- spreading smile as best as she could.

"Geronimo!"

An hour later, right after Rory and the Doctor had scanned every detail of the tiny body, counted fingers and toes and checked lungs and a head and a stomach, and the Doctor had the TARDIS run every possible test Rory could think of, Rory finally handed River her tiny, tiny son.

"Well." She smiled at him. "Hello Sweetie." She studied every inch of him the way she studied ruins, nuzzling him and kissing him everywhere she could. Then she gently handed him off to the anxiously waiting arms of his grandmother.

Amy smiled as she leaned over and cooed at her grandson. "Aren't you just the most precious boy in all the universe? You know, I don't think a more perfect baby boy has ever existed. No . Not in all time. It's you, kid." She lightly ran a finger down his face, tracing his fingers and toes and trying to memorize every detail of the moment. "Now, mind you- just because I'm young and gorgeous does not mean I can't be your Gran. In fact, there's no one I'd rather be at this particular moment." She placed a kiss on the top of his head, before turning and placing him in Rory's arms. "Though I guess it's only fair your granddad gets to say hi, too."

Rory had tears in his eyes as he looked at his grandchild, sniffling as he grabbed a little hand and shook it. "I'm Rory. I'm your granddad. Hello!" then he whispered. "Oh, River. He's amazing." He couldn't find words after that, so he hugged him close to his chest and rocked him back and forth. "You know, I think there's one more person to whom you haven't been properly introduced." He gently placed him in the Doctor's arms, kissing his head one last time as he released him. "Say hello to Daddy."

The Doctor bent down, kissing his son's face, then brought his chest up to his ear so he could hear what he thought was one of the sweetest sounds in the universe- two hearts pumping, sure and true.

"Hello." He whispered, almost afraid that if he spoke too loudly he'd find the child in his arms to be merely a dream. Then Amy and Rory lost the ability to understand him, as the Time Lord began to speak in his own language to one of his own kind for the first time in a long, long time.

When he finally looked away from his son, he brought him over to River, setting the baby between the two of them.

"He says it's nice to meet you. And he's wondered what you looked like from the outside for awhile. He likes the hair."

River smiled at her husband and son's ramblings, kissing her baby's face, then arm, then hand, then foot, as the Doctor continued to translate.

"And he said he'd like to be called- NO! He didn't!" The Doctor proclaimed, scandalized, as he reached into his pocket, first pulling out a small, speaker- like device, then his sonic screwdriver.

"Who didn't do what, Sweetie?"

"Must've put some sort of auditory perception filter on there- sending subliminal messages in utero."

"Doctor- what happened?" asked Amy, becoming a little alarmed at her best friend- who was sonicking, shaking, then listening to the device again and again, a shocked look on his face.

"A friend of mine- and I use the term loosely, gave River a recording of the Blue Orchestra of the Titanium Moon of Altrax, one of the best Orpheousan symphonies ever composed- said it would stimulate the baby's mind if we played it for him."

"But we both listened to it, Doctor. What was wrong with it?"

"Well- listen to what was hidden under the recording."

"I really like the name Captain Jack Harkness. Captain Jack Harkness is the best name. My parents should name me Captain Jack Harness. I'm going to beg my father for a cool name like Captain Jack Harkness. Or just name me Jack Harkness and I'll earn the 'captain.' I really like the name Captain Jack Harkness…"

"He didn't!" said River, trying to be very angry while simultaneously trying not to laugh hysterically.

"Yes. And guess what the first Time Lord born in centuries wants to be called?"

River pretended to ponder this seriously. "Anthony?"

One look at the Doctor's face and all three Ponds, and a little Song, did start howling in laughter, Amy and Rory ended up on the floor in hysterics and River had tears in her eyes when they finally calmed down enough. Eventually, even the Doctor managed a chuckle.

"Well. Anthony is undoubtedly a much better name that Jack."

"Captain Jack," Rory couldn't help clarify. "Don't want to put the poor boy under the pressure of climbing rank so soon after being born now do you?" This resulted in another bout of hysterics from Amy.

"Okay, okay. In all seriousness, Doctor- now that you've said it, I rather do like Anthony. What do you think?"

"I think it's a brilliant name."

"Anthony Song. Though it does sound like it's missing something doesn't it? Mum, Dad- why don't you choose his second name?"

"Shouldn't the Doctor-"

"I've already given him his Gallifreyan name- his real one that tells who he is. I think it fitting that humans give him his earth one."

Amy looked at her husband, her face lighting up with a smile. "I got to name our daughter. I think you should finish naming our grandson."

Rory looked to the faces around him. "Are you all sure?" Three faces nodded back to him.

"I- Well-" He looked down at the child in River's arms. "I need to think about it."

The Doctor and Amy huffed, while River smiled faintly. "It is an important decision. Go ahead and take your time. Besides, it might take us awhile to convince him he is not a captain and that Jack Harkeness is a terrible thing to be called."

They stayed in the vortex for two weeks, during which time Anthony Captain Song (They'd at least managed to convince him Jack Harkness didn't suit) insisted everyone except Mum salute before they pick him up- and seeing as he was rarely out of someone's arms, there were quite a few salutes all around. Amy and River chuckled whenever they found one of Rory's lists of names- checked then crossed, then respelled then crossed out again- throughout the TARDIS.

Finally, deciding they needed to return Amy and Rory to their proper time stream and their proper Doctor (as far as time streams in the time vortex went) and the Doctor to his proper TARDIS- not to mention get this one back to where she could wait for the past Doctor and River (who would need it when they ran from a tribe of flesh- eating snails), they decided to have one final conversation- passing the baby among them like a bowl of popcorn.

First, came Rory's announcement. "Ok. I've given this a lot of thought."

"Quite a lot."

"More than a lot."

"A lot was two notepads and 9 days ago."

"AHEM. As I was saying, I've given this a lot of thought- and I've settled on Anthony's second name. It should be Brian."

"Brian? After your dad?"

"Yeah. I mean- it's a good strong name- a family name. So he'll never forget where he's from when he's roaming the universe. Besides, my dad's a good man. Yeah. Brian."

"He always liked me- I'm for it." said River.

"Ha! A Brian a proper Pond!" exclaimed the Doctor, saluting before reaching for his son. "Ah! The Captain approves!"

"Anthony Brian Song. It's got a nice ring to it."

At this, River and the Doctor exchanged a glance. "Actually, Amy. That's not his name."

"What? But I thought you approved-"

"Yes, yes. The Brian part. And the Anthony part. It's the Song part we'd like to discuss with you."

River reached out and took her husband's hand.

"You see, the TARDIS is a wonderful place to live, to learn and to explore and to adventure. We- we're just not sure it's the best place to- to grow up."

"What?" whispered Amy, afraid they were going to send her precious grandson far away where she'd never see him again.

"Well, no matter where I go or when I go, I always know the earth is home. And even the Doctor had the stability a child needs when he grew up on Gallifrey. Even now- he still thinks of that as home. We want that for our son, too."

"So…so what are you saying?" questioned Rory- the same fear his wife had coursing through his veins.

"Well… when we come from… you two are more… settled. You- you don't travel with the Doctor anymore. Ever. Have a nice house. A nice yard. A place where… a small boy could possibly… grow roots. If he wanted to. Or, if his grandparents wanted him to."

Amy and Rory sat as still as Angels: relief, then confusion, then utter disbelief flowing through them.

"Wait. Are you- are you asking us to raise Anthony? Like, like his parents?"

"Yes." Said the Doctor firmly. "Not now, of course- but you'll know when the time comes."

"What- what about you two?"

"The Doctor can't not travel, and I have so many different expeditions scheduled that would be dangerous to take a baby on. We had originally planned to just take him with us, but after meeting him, and realizing what our lives will always be, we just want him to have a home. Where else could be home but with the two people who would love him as much as we do?"

"Plus, we want him to have you. And… we want you to have him."

Amy looked into her Raggedy Man's eyes, still shocked at what he was suggesting. Then, she softened, placing her hand on his and River's.

"You know, you don't have to give up your child to make up for the loss of ours."

The Doctor swallowed. Amy was always more perceptive than he was comfortable with.

"Yes, I do. And it's not giving him up. I'll have albums and memories and stories and recordings that he'll give me when he's ready. Time Lord- remember? I want him to have a normal life as long as he can, because when he's ready, he'll be able to spend the rest of his life with us in the stars- for as long as he wants. He has just enough human in him to age like a normal human child, but I took my granddaughter travelling with me when she was just 80 years old."

"Your- your granddaughter?"

"… And I can take our son with us once he's old enough or regenerates into a more fully Time Lord body."

"Please, Dad. Mum. We've given this a lot of thought. You couldn't raise me, but you are just the type of parents I want our son to have. Please. We don't want to force this on you, but we do want you to know we would be honored and extremely delighted if you did decide you wanted to do this."

"River- you're talking about losing a child. Like you said- we don't travel with the Doctor-"

"Yes, I said the Doctor. I never said me. And, it wouldn't be immediate, even for me. I want to keep him for at least a little while, then I'll take him to you guys. I know what it is I'm giving up- believe me, we've talked about this a lot. But, like the Doctor said, we have the rest of his life with him. But he'll have roots and security and a future, and he'll understand humans in a way my beautiful ageless god can't. I want to make sure my son seems as human and normal as possible to any enemy eyes who may be watching by giving him to a nice, familiar, normal couple. And missing this part of his life seems like a small price to pay for his safety."

Amy and Rory looked at each other, each finally realizing the danger their daughter's son would be in as long as he remained with either of his natural parents. And they refused to let any harm come to him, or to never see him again. They turned to River and the Doctor, wide grins on their faces.

"Ok. If you're really and truly sure about this, when the time comes, we'll keep Anthony safe."

"We are sure. 100% sure. We want you to raise our son as your own."

"Well then. In that case- you were right about the name. Song won't do." Said Rory, still giving a weak salute as he gathered their baby- all of theirs, he realized- into his arms. "He'll just have to settle for being Anthony Brian Williams."